Let's Name Names

     I've written several times this year, including just the other day, about the importance of using people's names whenever possible.  Today I spent a good portion of my day traveling home from Phoenix.  As is typically the case with traveling, I came into contact with so many different workers - people at the ticket counter, TSA folks, baggage handlers, flight attendants, workers at the Paradise Cafe where I bought lunch, and the shuttle driver for the offsite parking place, among many others.  Any time they were wearing a name tag, I made a point to thank them and wish them a good day, always using their name.  A number of times, people gave me a pleased smile, indicating the fact that I used their name had registered with them and made a difference.

     Recognizing this impact, it occurred to me that so many companies miss a huge opportunity to create human connections by not having people wear name tags.  I notice that when people are wearing a name tag, they seem to have an extra bounce in their step.  They walk with a little more pride.  I think it's because it helps them to feel less anonymous.  Incidentally, I think this is much more true when the name tag has the first name than their last.  If it only has their last name, it's more like a standard uniform than it is a personal statement.

     It also seems to me that there's even a bigger opportunity to create connections, particularly in the travel industry, when people's name tags also show where they're from.  Sometimes I see this with workers at resort golf clubs.  When you see where the person is from, and you know something about that place, it's so totally natural to strike up a conversation with them, comparing notes or seeking additional connections you may each have.  Even when you don't know anything about the place, their hometown can be a conversation starter, especially if it's somewhere unusual.  

     I think that it an increasingly impersonal world, most of us relish the chance to feel more connected to each other.  Nothing helps this happen more quickly and easily than using each other's names.

What's In A Name?

     A few weeks ago I was at a doctor's office, and after the exam he proceeded to dictate the treatment notes into a laptop that was sitting on a desk in the room.  As I listened to him describe "the patient's" condition, and the recommendations he made to "the patient", it seemed to me that this was a bit dehumanizing, as it tended to objectify me as "the patient" instead of describing me as a real person named David.  I've been thinking a lot about this topic since that day, and my ruminations have led me to resolve to be different.

     As I went out to do some errands today, I made a commitment to myself that I would use people's specific names at every opportunity that I could.  I had a bunch of chances to practice this just in one trip to Wegman's.  Pretty much everyone there (and this seems to be true in most retail establishments these days) wears a nametag that displays their first name.  When I went to the deli counter to buy some lunch meat, I said thank you to Megan.  When I was helped at the butcher's counter, I made sure to thank Mike for his assistance.  And when I went through the checkout line, I wished Mia a good day. 

     While this may seem like a small detail, I think it has an effect on both me and the person whose name I'm using.  For the other person, it's a form of acknowledgement that I see them as a unique individual, and not simply a checkout person or deli counter person.  I've often heard that people's favorite word in any language is their own name and that we even have a biological response to the sound of our name.  Using their name helps them feel more valued, and less objectified.

     Just as important, though, is the effect it has on me.  I think when I call the person by name, it reminds me in a very fundamental way that they're a person with their own unique story.  They have a family, they have likes and dislikes, they have hopes and dreams and fears and all the things that are part of being human.  A deli counter person is just a worker paid to process my order; but Megan is a real person with whom I can connect and for whom I can show kindness.   

     I know that I can sometimes be guilty of being too focused on the transaction, even when doing an act of kindness, and not enough on the human connection. As I go through this year and do my various acts of kindness, I want to learn to be better about making those connections.  Using people's names whenever possible is a good start.